Just One Marathon

Smells Like Teen Inspiration

I was poking around the house last week, engaging in two of my favourite pre-run rituals: bitching and complaining.

 

After my usual slow start, I was dressed and ready to go, but dragging my butt around the house, finding excuses not to get out the door. My two adolescent sons were still in their pyjamas, enjoying the no-time-limit computer free-for-all that we usually allow on the first few days of summer vacation. I paused by the door of the computer room, envying their leisure and sighed, “I just don’t feel like going for a run right now.”

 

My 15-year old son put his hands on my shoulders, looked me in the eye and offered these words of encouragement:

 

“Suck it up, princess.”

 

There was a pause, and we both burst out laughing. Then I headed out the door, feeling strangely rejuvenated.

Regarding Speed Bumps (the good kind)

Do you get the bump? You know, that little burst of energy that seems to kick in after running about 5K? I love the bump. Some runs, I live for the bump. Some runs, it’s the only good thing about the whole run, except for the part where you get to stop. The stopping part is also good.

 

The thing is, on a good day, I don’t just get a bump at 5K. When all is going well, there are all kinds of little milestones that give me a small adrenaline kick.

 

Things that Give Me “The Bump” on a Run:

- Other runners, especially when they smile, wave, nod or offer high fives.

- Cute, friendly dogs on leash, carrying big sticks in their mouths like treasures.

- Dads out with their babies and toddlers on Sunday morning, letting their wives sleep in.

- Old couples out for a walk, holding hands.

- Deer standing in a field, cautiously observing me from a distance.

- Turning the corner and feeling the wind at my back.

- Having a great new song with uncannily appropriate lyrics pop up on my iPod at just the right moment, a gift from the Pod Gods.

- A long, slow, gentle downward slope at the end of a run.

- Turning the corner onto my street and meeting a neighbour, providing the perfect excuse to en the run early.

 

That’s when things are going well. On a bad day, it’s just one long, bump-less slog, similar to crawling across a desert towards an imaginary water hole. 

 

How about you? What gives you the bump (running or otherwise)?

Another Late Assignment: Half-Marathon Race Report

I've submitted my second assignment for the course-from hell. Woohoo! But just 12 hours later, it was returned (unmarked) by my tutor for revisions because it’s improperly “formatted”. Crap. Those revisions are made and now, while I wait for the next exciting response from psycho tutor (I hope she never finds this blog), I’m taking a break to file my race report for the National Capital Race Weekend.  

 

In an effort to avoid porta-potty breaks while running the Ottawa half-marathon, I went to the bathroom six times in the two hours before the race. Maybe it was nerves, or maybe it was just something my body needed to do that morning. Whatever. I lined up, used the facilities, then got right back in the line again. And again. And again.

 

Still, as I stood in the crush of over 9,000 runners waiting to start the race at on Sunday morning, I had just one thought: “I really have to pee.”

 

That could have been a bad moment. Fortunately for me, though, one of the very important skills I’ve learned as a working mom* is how to Hold It. Seriously, there are times when, after a full day of meetings, I am running from the office to the car and thinking, “Maybe I’ll have a chance to pee after dinner.” So running two hours with a full bladder? Piece of cake.

 

That was the inspirational start to a half-marathon whose theme seemed to be, “It could have been worse.” Sure I was 10 minutes slower than my PR, but at least I didn’t log a PW (personal worst). I squeaked in 3 minutes ahead of that benchmark.

 

Yes, it was one of the first really warm days of the season, which can be tough when your body is not yet acclimatized to hot weather running. However, there was a beautiful breeze blowing across the canal for much of the run.

 

True, my Garmin decided to “work to rule” just three minutes into the run and showed nothing but the time of day for the entire run. But I was able to keep the two-hour pace bunny in my sites for the first 11 kilometres of the race. Then I spent the final 10K of the race imagining I could feeling the hot breath of the 2:15 pace bunny on the back of my neck.

 

So, while it wasn’t the most transcendentally positive race experience I’ve ever had, it certainly wasn’t anywhere near the most dreadful.

 

Time: 2:09

Place (gender/age): 166/644

 

What was more inspiring was watching the rest of my family participate in race weekend events on the day before. Kudos to The Runner I Married for running 5K with my 12-year old son and his best friend at 5 p.m., then running the 10K with my 15-year old son at 6:30 p.m. Both races were sold out, so he negotiated a huge crush of people along both routes and still managed to finish the race in just over 48 minutes.

 

The boys did a great job, too. My oldest son, Will, has been keeping a daily health log as an assignment for his grade 9 gym class. When I read his “motivational thought” for the day before the race, I nearly fell off my chair laughing. It said, “At least if I die in my sleep, I won’t have to run 10K tomorrow.” In the end, he ran a PR and lived to tell the tale.

 

* I have no doubt that stay-at-home moms (who are also working) also deserve the Iron Bladder award. After their morning coffee, they're probably thinking, "Maybe I'll get to pee if the kids have a nap."

Didn't You Used To Blog?

I'm on a self-imposed blogging ban until I finish my second assignment in the course from hell. I hope to wrap up by Tuesday, after which I'll be back with my usual complaints, excuses and rationalizations.

In the meantime, thank goodness for other bloggers and their unflagging, guilt-inspiring commitment to running and writing. It keeps the pressure on and makes me excited to rediscover the joyful runner I was one year ago, when this picture was taken. Keep up the good work!

Now its back to the books for me.

Skirting the Issue

Running women, here’s a question for you. Running skirts: are you for them or against them? Me, I’m ambivalent.

 

On one hand, they hark back to the days when ladies wore bathing suits that covered them from neck to ankle, rode horses side-saddle, and didn’t run marathons because it was considered unsafe for women. There’s just something about a running skirt that might, just might, say: “I’m more interested in looking good than performing well”.

 

On the other hand, running skirts could be considered a natural progression for a sport that is increasingly appealing to women. Wearing a running skirt might also say, “I’m a runner and also a woman. I don’t need to dress like a man to run like the wind.” Also, the women I’ve seen wearing running skirts always look incredibly hip.

 

The tipping point for me came when blogger Donna purchased a running skirt for her first marathon. Not only does she look great in her race photos, but she also commented that the skirt featured a handy pocket big enough to carry a peanut butter sandwich. Room for snacks: now that’s a selling feature.

 

With those thoughts in mind, when my husband asked what I wanted for Mother’s Day this year, I told him I wanted a running skirt. So last Sunday, we headed to one of our favourite sports stores and I hit the change room with my arms full of running skirts. I also spied a very cool red sleeveless running shirt on the sale rack and snapped it up, because it’s hard to find women’s running gear that’s not in pastels.

 

I put the skirt on and looked at it from every angle. Huh. I called my husband and asked him what he thought. He hesitated, and said, uncomfortably, “It looks ...” He paused. For a really long time.

 

“Stupid?” I said, finishing what was plainly his thought – and mine.

 

“No, no, no, not stupid,” he replied (we’ve been married for 17 years and he’s not an idiot), “Just not, ummm, not …” He couldn’t finish.

 

I was afraid he might be thinking, “Not appropriate for someone your age.” But hey, I’ve been married for 17 years, too, and I know where that kind of paranoia can lead, so I didn’t probe the thought.

 

Anyways, I didn’t end up buying the skirt. Which doesn’t mean I don’t think they look great on women runners. Just not on this woman runner. I did buy the red shirt, though.

Imaginary Problems

Good news! My crappy running performance is already paying off – in life lessons. For the last couple of days, I’ve been really disheartened about the fact that I’m so much slower than I was last fall. That feeling has not helped my mental outlook or running abilities.

 

So I’ve been thinking about it, and I’ve realized that I can divide my worries into two categories: real problems and imaginary problems. Here’s the breakdown, for example, when I consider my recent running effort:

 

Imaginary problems:

- I’m not a “real runner” if I’m not going fast.

- Completing the half-marathon or any other running event somehow won’t be as much of an accomplishment if I finish one or two minutes slower.

- I’ll never get my speed back.

- I think I might be a lazy slacker.

 

Real problems:

- I’m not feeling as energetic as I once did on my runs. I often feel tired, sluggish and out of breath

- I’m not running as many kilometres as I used to run because work and school are much more demanding.

 

Some of my imaginary problems might end up being real problems – I might never get my speed back. But dwelling on my “imaginary” problems does me no good at all. It just turns running into a big source of guilt and frustration, which is the opposite of what running normally does for me.

 

The “real” problems I have can be addressed. To feel more energetic, I can make an effort to get more rest, get my iron levels checked, pay more attention to my eating habits, or just count on the healing powers of time as I gradually recover from a recent cold. As for running more kilometres, I can either work really hard to carve out more running time, or just accept the fact that I’m giving what I can right now. 

 

Also, listing my real problems reminds me of all the real problems I don’t have. For example, I’m not injured, I am perfectly able to complete the required distances, and I am recovering really quickly from my long runs. 

 

And a big reality check here: in the grand scheme of things, running a little slower is not any kind of problem – real or imaginary. For that, I am grateful.

Reluctant Runner and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Run

Wow, have my runs have sucked lately.

 

I’m training to run a half marathon at the National Capital Race Weekendon Sunday, May 24^th. Each Sunday morning, I head out full of hope that this will be the day I regain the “top of game” feeling I had last fall, when I managed to squeak in under the 2 hour mark at Ottawa’s new Army Run. And each Sunday, I come back through my door dragging my butt and hanging my head (there’s a pretty picture), knowing I’ve managed to achieve an average pace just a notch slower than the week before.

 

There are lots of reasons and a few excuses. I’ve clocked fewer miles, gained a couple of pounds, and generally adopted an attitude on most runs that “just getting out there” is enough, never mind pushing myself. I’ve also been really busy and a little run down (those are the excuses). Regardless, there are not miracles in running. You get what you give.

 

The Runner I Married has reminded me that every runner eventually comes to terms with the fact that the running experience is not just achieving one PR (personal record) after another. There are good runs and bad. There are times when everything comes together beautifully and times when it doesn’t. Still, after a long stretch of one cool, new thing after another (my first 5K! my first 10K! a marathon!), I may be about to experience another new thing: my first big disappointment. Not a PR, but a PW (personal worst).

 

So be it. I’ll run this race, be glad for what I can accomplish, and learn from the experience.

How To Get What You Want: Lessons From An 11-Year Old

Let’s say you want a cat.

 

Your parents are opposed to the idea. They argue that you already have a dog – a great dog. A cat would only add an unnecessary complication to your family’s already busy household. Plus, your Dad is, to put it mildly, not a cat person. He barely tolerated your last cat, which only lived under the same roof with him because he came as a package deal with your Mom. Knowing all that, how would you proceed? Here are a few lessons from someone who knows a thing or two about getting what he wants: my 11 (soon to be 12) year old son.

 

Lesson 1: Start Early. If your birthday is in April, start before Christmas.

 

Lesson 2: Be Persistent. Don’t be discouraged when your parents sit you down to earnestly explain that, for a variety of good reasons, getting a cat is just not a good idea right now. Nod your head, say, “I know, I know,” look a bit sad, then resume your campaign the next day.

 

Lesson 3: Repeat Your Message. Mention the cat at least once a day, more if possible. Work the idea into most conversations, regardless of whether or not they concern cats. For example, if the weather is fine, comment that, “It would be even better if we had a CAT.”

 

Lesson 4: Make Bold Promises. Vow that you and you alone will be responsible for changing the cat litter. Without being reminded. Don’t laugh even once when making this promise.

 

Lesson 5: Show Commitment. Don’t be swayed when your parents try to bribe and distract you with the offer of a new Nintendo DSi for your birthday.

 

Lesson 6: Be Charming. If you sense your parents starting to weaken and saying that they might consider getting a cat, be charmingly, giddily happy. When you fall in love with a kitten instead of the older, more sedate cat your parents were hoping they would adopt, give them your most heart-rending, pleading, big-eyed stare and whisper, “But he's my favourite cat.”

 

Follow all these steps, and you might end up as happy as this boy:

This post was reviewed and approved by Jamie, who would also like to post this picture of Chester, the cat:

Ain't It Good To Know...

My friends are amazing. I know everyone says that about their friends, but mine really, really are. Really.

Want proof? No problem. Let me give you two recent examples of how my creative and talented friends have supported my recent infatuation with running.

When I ran the marathon last May (have I mentioned lately that I ran a marathon?), my friend Lisa not only showed up at four different spots along the route to cheer me on, she also made me a special sign which included my blog details, bib number, and a few motivational slogans. She presented the sign to me afterwards (it’s hot-ironed onto a pillow case), so it’s also a one-of-a-kind commemorative souvenir of my one and only marathon. Here it is:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The mittens resting on top of the sign are exhibits 2 and 3 in the case for my friends being the best in the world. Those beauties are the glorious Mittens of Motivation, knitted by my friend Kelly. Last Christmas, I was outlining for Kelly my possibly-ridiculous dream of qualifying for the Boston Marathon one day. When I told her the qualifying time for a woman at my … ahem … stage of life, she quietly filed the information away. About a month later, I received these in the mail:

Look closely at the mittens – the entire pattern is made up of 4’s. Appearing prominently on the wrist, where I can see it if I glance down is my goal time: 4.0 hours. Not only are the mittens funky, beautiful and warm, but they are also inspirational. Like my friends.

These are just a couple of examples of the generous support and caring demonstrated by my friends and family. I only hope I can be the same kind of supportive friend in return.

 

What about you? Have your friends inspired you? Or have you had the opportunity to support a friend in her running or other goals?

Mashed Potatoes, Hold The Gravy

As a rabid fan of public radio, I am loving the story about Billy Bob Thornton’s tantrum on CBC earlier this week. In case you missed it, Billy Bob, who was appearing on the radio show to promote his band’s tour, became seriously miffed when host Jian Ghomeshi mentioned in his introduction – despite being “instructed” by his publicist not to talk about his acting career – that in addition to being a band member, Thornton was also an Oscar winning actor, screenwriter and director. BBT sulkily refused to answer questions, gave weird and rambling responses when he did answer, and insulted Canadian audiences, referring to us as (and I paraphrase), ‘mashed potatoes without the gravy’. Then he refused to play with his band, claiming that he hadn’t brought his drum set with him because it was so early in the morning.

The interview is perfect in two ways. Firstly, Billy Bob is a perfect asshole. It is really, really fun to watch. Unless you have a toddler, you don’t often get to observe this kind of behaviour close up. And Jian is also perfect, providing a textbook example of assertiveness by standing by his principles while at the same time being polite and classy. Now that’s Canadian.

If you haven't seen the interview, check it out below.

Reflecting on the interview, though, I was thinking that as I rise to new heights in my running career, it might be helpful to the CBC and other media organizations to provide “instructions” for anyone who might wish to interview me about my running career. Here are a few initial thoughts.

1. First of all, other than running (or possibly blogging about running), please do not mention anything else I do to pass my time. No matter how glamorous and exciting it may sound, do not ask me about my high-flying career in human resources, my experiences as a wife and mother, or my brief and unsuccessful period of experimentation with pottery. Nope, I came to running fully formed with nothing influencing me and no one helping me to get here. Please do not suggest otherwise.

2. If you’d like to ask about any off-beat magazine subscriptions that may have influenced my early running career, here are two hints: Betty and Veronica. As far as I recall, the gals never exercised, but did display admirable competitive spirit in the battle for Archie’s affections

3. Wondering what food metaphors I might use to describe Canadian spectators at running events? Think carbs. Or gels. Or possibly energy drinks.

4. Before you ask me any question, you might find it helpful to ask yourself, “Would you ask Paula Radcliffe that question?” If not, then I don’t know why you’re asking me, since I have run a marathon and I understand Paula may have run a few herself. We’re, like, just the same.

5. Don’t even think of asking me to run in your studio. I checked my training schedule and it's a rest day.

Hope you have a wonderful long weekend